5 Steps to Rebuild Trust with Your Partner
Trust is such an important part of a relationship that once it has been broken, you can hardly rebuild it by just saying “sorry”. Rebuilding trust takes a lot of time and effort as well as making changes that enable forgiveness. You can’t easily restore a person’s trust especially if you two are in a intimate relationship. If you are aggrieved partner, you will always doubt and be afraid that something could happen again without your knowledge. You may also question everything about your relationship. Once trust has been crushed completely, it shakes the foundation of your relationship.
When you try to let go of what happened and want to save your relationship, the trauma of the breach is not easily forgotten. Both parties won’t ever feel at ease with each other again unless everything has been discussed and the past has been fully dealt with. Rebuilding your partner’s trust may seem too hard to achieve, but everything is possible so long as you are willing to work with them to win back the trust and never break it again under any circumstances.
If you really want to keep your relationship strong, you may consider these five steps to rebuild trust with your partner so you can both have peace of mind and feel secure with each other for years to come.
Be consistent. You have to do things consistently so there won’t be any questions about your intentions. Your daily activities should be shared with your partner so that there won’t be any suspicions or fears that you may be doing it again.
Fulfill your promises no matter what. When you promise to do something, you must follow through on it. You can’t rebuild the shattered trust if you keep breaking your promises. Only time and good experiences will repair the broken trust.
Transparency in everything you do: That means telling and sharing with your partner everything you do, your whereabouts and your thoughts and feelings. Also, being available to your partner to answer questions and help soothe their fears when needed.
Be committed. Commitment is a must when you want to make your relationship last. You have to be committed not just with your words but especially with your actions. Saying sorry differs a lot from being sorry for what you have done to break their trust. Your commitment to making your partner feel that they are your first priority will help them heal and trust you again.
Apologized deeply and with utmost sincerity. You must prove that you regret shattering the trust and hurting the feelings of that special person in your life. You need to apologize in a way that convinces your partner that you really mean it, that you understand why your actions really damaged your relationship.
You can’t rebuild trust overnight; it will really take time, patience and determination for you to fully regain it. Both parties should be willing to give each other a second chance to make the relationship work. Once you make a decision to try it again, you must leave the past behind and make a fresh start.
Couples counseling San Mateo provided by Edna Avraham, MFT.